[Golf Sheet / Week 9 Thursday, 07-09-2026]<-click

MAJESTIC CANCELED LEAGUE GOLF 7/2

SBITES (aka Snapper Bites)

CUDOS :
GREENIES: DAVE FUREY & ART KARDITZ

5-HOLE: CONGRATS SNAPPER

TEAM SKIN: #15 was cut with team net “9s” by CMO/CAM & SNAPDADDY/T

Birdies???? Yep…1 for ROMO..1 for ART

EAGLES: ???? as the GHOSTBUSTERS telephone receptionist said when they got their 1st job : WE GOT ONE!!!!!!
SHANG on # 2 carded a “2” ask him about it.

LOW ACTUAL and LOW NET???? WOLF shot 39 for LOW ACTUAL the 3rd time this season DABLADE finished tabulating (carry the 1 multiply by 2 oh wait there’s another stroke) then subtracted his “20” handicap and WAH LAH! “31” Nice JC
AOTD: NOPE NOT THIS WEEK.

Blade’s Slice

As you should be aware, League play was canceled for Thursday, July 2nd due to the “Heat Dome” (which would be a good nickname for Timmy). As per the rule regarding the SCHEDULE, it “shall be considered binding throughout the season…” WITH a couple of changes.

1) The scheduled match pairings for July 2nd have been moved to August 20th.
2) The season-ending Position Round has been moved to August 27th and extending the season by one extra week (keeping the 16-week total)
3) The starting hole assignments are not tied to our matches and will not shift (per The Majestic).

UPDATED SCHEDULE

Congrats to Emma, the current Majestic Beer Babe of the Week.

And now a snapshot update from the Big Bear Bald Eagle Cam. Who took Sandy the eaglet?

♫ Thursday evening 5 PM
♪ I saw fire in the sky
♫ I felt my heart pound in my chest
♪ I heard an eagle cry

Have a great Fourth of July!

GO SNAPPERS 2026!!!!

[Golf Sheet / Week 8 Thursday, 06-25-2026]<-click

SBITES  (aka Snapper Bites)

CUDOS :     

GREENIES:  WOLF & SHANG

5-HOLE:  CONGRATS   ART KARDITZ

TEAM SKIN:  FUREY & ROMO (who now have 30 7 weeks skin$$$)

Birdies????  Yep…1 for ART 1 for ROMO  and 2 for SHANG

LOW ACTUAL and LOW NET???? Speaking of SHANG he carded both of these honors  with 38/33

AOTD: NOPE NOT THIS WEEK. WOLF WAS EXTRA CAREFUL TO FIND HIGH GROUND.

WOUNDED SNAPPER UPDATE: MIKE WALKER who fractured about 50 of the total 27 bones found in the human hand just prior to the season’s start is beginning week 3 of what  appears may be a 52 week recovery. But it is feeling better. Just maybe not strong enough to grip a 9 iron squeeze and pound a golf ball. I told him if he is looking for something else to pound  (no don’t go there)  he should come out and pound a beer or 2 with us on league night.

BEER BABE OF THE WEEK:    KARA CONGRATS     

Blade’s Slice

Shang haf velly nice reek rast reek wif row and net scoah, two birdie and one gleenie, so in honah of Shang is this Rimlick…

There once was a Snapper named Shang
Who hit the ball with a bang
The problem, said Romo
The ball wasn’t always his owno
But that’s good enough for the girls in Huang

You’re welcome. Fear not, there will be no surcharge on your League fees for this weekly professional prose.

Last week I teased a new video game in production that was inspired by our own Dave Wolfenden and his Indiana Jones-type antics on the golf course. Here is the latest screenshot…

GO SNAPPERS 2026!!!!

[Golf Sheet / Week 7 Thursday, 06-18-2026]<-click

CUDOS :  

GREENIES:  ROMO & EDDIE “THE EAGLE” STOTZ

5-HOLE:  CONGRATS ED STOTZ

TEAM SKIN!  CMONEY “CARL” & CAM B

Birdies galore.  2 each for J Wolf, Dave Furey and Mike Romo, and a single birdie each for Timmy K, Dave Wolf, Cam B and Rick North.

LOW ACTUAL: MIKE ROMO & SUPER SUB ART KADITZ “38”

LOW NET: CAM BARNETT “32”

AOTD: (as reported by CMONEY) Wolf found his ball in the muck short of the 140yd par 3 green.  He placed two timid steps in and bent down to retrieve his precious Noodle.  Disaster struck as his right foot sank deeper and he was now knee deep in the muck.  Like quicksand every pull of his left foot sank the right and vice versa.  After 5 mins and getting no where. Jason Wolf shed his footwear and bound into the muck to mount his daring rescue.  Amid a tirade of curse words and both Wolfs now knee deep in muck.  J Wolf pulled and pried and was able to wrestle the angry Elder Wolf back to the safety of the murky death trap.

BEER BABE OF THE WEEK:  CONGRATS to Chelsea!

BLADE’s SLICE

Blade’s Slice
When I was a kid I thought quicksand was gonna be a way bigger problem. This has been a humorous meme pointing out that quicksand was a factor in numerous movies and TV shows, and… (for those of us old enough to remember) playing the video game “Pitfall!” on out Atari 2600 – but never in real life. Until now, as Wolf says, “hold my beer!”

The hero in the video game was “Pitfall Harry”, who collected treasure in a jungle populated by hazards including rolling logs, scorpions, crocodiles, and yes – quicksand! “Pitfall Dave’s” treasure was his Noodle golf ball, almost within reach atop a tar pit in front of the green. In fairness to “Pitfall Dave,” there is no swinging vine to grasp while trying to traverse this hazard.

PICTURED: Skipper sinks into an island patch of quicksand looking for his golf ball, while his “little buddy” Gilligan stands safely on the edge. Will he help the Skipper, like “little buddy” J Wolf helped his old man?

PICTURED: a screenshot of the new golf video game for your phone called “Pitfall Wolf!”

GO SNAPPERS 2026!!!!

[Golf Sheet / Week 6 Thursday, 06-11-2026]<-click

 SBITES  (aka Snapper Bites)

GREENIES:  ROMO & HOLLYWOOD

5-HOLE:  CONGRATS DAVE FUREY

TEAM SKIN!  LITTLE TIMMY K & STEVE

Birdies????  Yep…2 as a matter of fact for JWOLF and 1 each for TK, SHANG & ROMO

HOLLYWOOD & CMONEY “42”  each for low actual for the week but STEVE got Low Net with  “32”

AOTD: SHANG won upon Romo’s nomination in absentia (that means he already left and was not there to defend himself TIMMY). SHANG was accused and w/o defense deemed guilty of failing to adequately apologize after hitting the wrong ball (Furey’s) and getting caught doing so. SHANG’s somewhat errant shot was found by ROMO thusly during the search.

ROMO: “you playing a Titleist Red 15?”

SHANG: (just before hitting) “Yep that’s me”

FUREY: “Hey where’s my Titleist Red 15?”

OGI: “Here is a VICE no # weren’t you playing those?” 

SHANG:  “yep that’s me!”

ROMO:  “Anybody hit a NOODLE?”

SHANG:  “Yep that’s me too”.

ROMO: “Wait, I got a KIRKLAND”

SNAPPER: (from the next fairway) “HEY THAT’S ME” 

SHANG:  “What # I think that’s me?” Ater hitting what was assumed or accepted by all as being the proper ball (a yellow RAM )

FUREY politely inquired about having his ball returned to him.

SHANG: “Your problem.  It’s somewhere over there.”

ROMO: “you gonna take a penalty stroke or 2?” 

Shang rightly then quoted the liberal hit wrong ball find yours and treat 1^st as provisional  precedent of Snappers.

ROMO then asked at least for an apology and SHANG refused, mumbling “he shoulda got outta my way” or words to that effect. Anyway that is how I recall the recitation of the nomination with no one present to dispute it and Furey silently nodding his head along the way.

GO SNAPPERS 2026!!!!

[Golf Sheet / Week 5 Thursday, 06-04-2026]<-click

CUDOS :                                

GREENIES:  MIKE T  & ED STOTZ each shagged one . 

5-HOLE:  CONGRATS MIKE T

TEAM SKIN!  TONY T.

Birdies????  Yep…. I SAW 1 and only 1 for FUREY.!!

MIKE T & CMOMNEY “33” each for low net for the week but MIKE T got Low Actual with  “40”

DUAL BEER BABE AWARDS FOR OUTSTANDING SERVICE IN THE SAME WEEK?   WHY  NOT??   CONGRATS: BROOKE

CONGRATS: EMERSON

GO SNAPPERS 2026!!!!

[Golf Sheet / Week 4 Thursday, 05-28-2026]<-click

HOW MANY SCORECARDS WERE NOT TURNED IN? 50 % OF LEAGUE? WHAT IS THAT ABOUT?

SBITES  (aka Snapper Bites)

CUDOS :      

BEER BABE OF THE WEEK?  CONGRATS: MADDIE

GREENIES:  TIMMY K and SHANG each shagged one (again).  Thx. I didn’t have to change this on the sheet.

5-HOLE:  CONGRATS RICK NORTH

TEAM SKIN!  Admitting to sandbagging until it was “worth it to win it” Team FUREY/ROMO each parred 22 with a ding each for a 2 week carryover pot.

Birdies????  Yep…. 1 each for  WOLF ,JWOLF, & ROMO and 2 for FUREY.

WOLF’S run on low actual and low net ended by ROMO “38” & CMONEY “33”

AOTD: Dual dishonors were awarded by unanimous consent to STEVE MARKUNAS & JERRY CARLSON. Each was noticeably absent at the post round scoring and awards (which is fine as not mandatory to greet other league members for a few moments). What is not fine is failure and neglect of duty when a designated Card Captain to get your scorecard turned in for scoring and awards for those who did win. When it was noted that sufficient time had passed for everyone to have completed their round and even their opponents for the night were present on deck fully ONE HALF (50%) (NO LESS THAN 2 0f 4) of the leagues scorecards were fished out of the garbage by Majestic staff. Sadly Not the 1^st time this has happened.  Speculation abounded that Steve had given his card to Jerry and/or Jerry had given  his card to Steve  with promises made 1 to the other, but alas Card Captain  Designation & Responsibility is not transferable.  

CARD CAPTAIN’s please take this sacred  honor and privilege of responsibility to see that your card is not only given to someone but that it is given to someone  who is  supposed to get it for scoring & prizes ie CMO, Tony or Snapper.

Blade’s Slice

This week’s musical interlude is another 100% original tune that I call…
“I’m Your Card Captain” (any similarities to a Grand Funk tune is strictly coincidental)

(SnapDaddy)
♫ Everybody, listen to me
♪ And return me my score card
♪ I’m your Snapper, I’m your Snapper
♫ Though I’m feeling mighty ticked

(Blade)
♫ If its lost now, strokes uncounted!
♪ And it’s minutes since I’ve left for home
♪ Can you hear me? Can you hear me?
♫ I got your text on my phone.?

(SnapDaddy)
♫ If you return me my score card
♪ I will diss you, brother Blade
♫ Bring it back now, bring it back now
♪ To the beer deck and my perch.

(Cartboy)
♫ Am I in my golf cart dreaming
♪ Or am I really scheming
♪ To throw this league card in the trash?
♫ I’d better think about it
♪ I just don’t care about it
♪ So, please don’t take my nap from me, yeah, yeah, yeah

(Blade and Hollywood)
♫ I’m your card captain, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
♫ I’m your card captain, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ I’m getting closer to my home
♪ I’m getting closer to my home
♪ I’m getting closer to my home…

GO SNAPPERS 2026!!!!

[Golf Sheet / Week 3 Thursday, 05-21-2026]<-click

“If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of Giants”.
Isaac Newton (who discovered gravity playing golf)

SBITES  (aka Snapper Bites)

CUDOS :  

GREENIES:  TIMMY K and SHANG each shagged one.  WAY TO GO!  HOW YOU LIKE THAT TEE BOX ON #16 TK?

  We have never seen that one before and maybe never will again. What was it 108 yds????

 5-HOLE:  This went to SHANG who  is just getting used to those old man tees.

TEAM SKIN!  Not this week. The Wolfendon’s two “4”s  plus dings was cut by CAM & CMO’s 5 and 3 with dings.

Birdies????  Yep…. 1 for  CHRIS on #10 the one I just told ya about.  TK got one on 16…..Shang on 18  (from the gold tees by the way )…. And two for DAVE WOLFENDEN.  Speaking of WOLF did I mention he got low actual and low net last week????  Well he did it again this week. NICE 37 actual.

ASSHOLE OF THE DAY?   Nope.

BEER BABE OF THE WEEK  Congrats to Avery

Blade’s Slice:

Dean Martin sings about the cold temperatures we’ve had the first few weeks of the season, and trying to convince the beer girl to stay with his group for the rest of the round…

♫ I really can’t stay (But, baby, it’s cold outside)
♬ I’ve got to go away (But, baby, it’s cold outside)
♫ So very nice (I’ll hold your hands, they’re just like ice)
♪ My boss will start to worry (Beautiful, what’s your hurry?)
♫ The next group will want to wet their beak (Don’t you want to be Beer Babe of the Week?)
♪ But maybe just a half a drink more (go tee off while I pour)

And to close out my dedication to Frank Sinatra…

“Fairway” (not to be confused with “My Way” – though I didn’t change much 🙂

♫ And now, the end of the round is near
♬ And so I face the final curtain (last whole gallery)
♫ My friend, I’ll say it clear
♪ I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain
♫ I’ve golfed a round that’s full
♪ I traveled each and every trap and waterway
♫ And more, much more than this, I missed the fairway

♫ Regrets, I’ve had a few
♪ But then again, too few to mention
♪I did what I had to do (foot wedges)
♪ And saw it through without exemption (pic pic?)
♫ I planned each charted course
♬ Each careful step along the byway
♪ And more, much more than this, I missed the fairway

♫ Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew
♪ When I bit off more than I could chew
♪ But through it all, when there was doubt
♫ I ate it up and spit it out
♪ I faced it all and I stood tall and missed the fairway

♬ For what is a man, what has he got?
♪ If not himself, then he has naught
♬ To say the things he truly feels
♪ And not the words of one who kneels
♪ The record shows
♪ I took the blows
♬ And missed the fairway

♪ Yes, missed the fairway

GO SNAPPERS 2026!!!!

[Golf Sheet / Week 2 Thursday, 05-14-2026]<-click

SBITES  (aka Snapper Bites)

WELCOME BACK TEAM DAVE FUREY and MIKE ROMANOWSKI!!!  IT IS LIKE YOU NEVER LEFT!

We now have an even number of teams again (until  Mike Walker returns.  Wounded Snapper Update. YEA THAT’S RIGHT HE MAY HAVE BROKEN EVERY BONE IN HIS HAND, WRIST, FOREARM AND WHATEVER ELSE BUT IN HIS OWN WORDS;

I’M GONNA BE BACK!

CUDOS :      

Our 1^st BEER BABE OF THE WEEK – Congrats Emerson!

GREENIES:  Cameron Barnett and Glenn Simmington .  WAY TO GO!

 5-HOLE:  This went to Dave Furey who won on the 1^st carry over with a par  on # 6. OGI…

TEAM SKIN:  Steve Markunas and Glenn Simmington won with 2 pars and 2 dings on the par 3 # 4,…..nice job boys!  Birdies????  Yep…. 1 for  each Tomaszewski Brothers

ASSHOLE OF THE DAY?   No we don’t do that anymore apparently. Ahh But not so fast.

I HAVE TO ADMIT TO HAVEMISTAKENLY NEGLECTED MY DUTY TO NOMINATE WHAT I BELIEVE YOU WILL ALL AGREE IS  A DESERVING CANDIDATE LAST WEEK. Since you would all agree I am making this our first AOTD award of the year by official proclamation. RICK NORTH wins the award for apparently attempting unsuccessfully to swindle himself. I mean what else do you call placing $596 cash into an envelope, sealing it and writing his name and the amount contained inside as   “ $ 296”? SNAPPER rightly inquired without opening the envelope when he intended to pay the rest. How much is it he asked. $592 I answered. Keep the change as a tip he exclaimed. Completely confused the envelope was opened to indeed  reveal  the money was indeed all there (not just the $296 claimed) including the $4 over payment. I tied  to give him his $4 and Rick said no it’s a tip. Me thinks it was a bribe attempt to avoid AOTD NOMINATION.

Blade’s Slice

Here is the full 2026 REVISED SCHEDULE (until another team is added).

This week’s musical interlude is another 100% original tune that I call…
“That’s Golf” (any similarities to a Frank Sinatra tune is strictly coincidental)

♫ That’s golf (that’s golf)
♪ That’s what all the Snappers say
♫ You’re riding high in April, shot down the first Thursday in May
♪ But I know I’m gonna change that tune
♫ When I’m back on top, back on top in June
♪ I said that’s golf (that’s golf)
♫ And as funny as it may seem
♪ Some people get their kicks
♫ Stomping on a dream (Thanks Wolfs!)
♪ But I don’t let it, let it get me down
♫ ‘Cause the beer babe keeps comin’ around
♪ That’s golf

BONUS BLUE EYES MEDLEY!
“Fly Me To The Moon”
♫ Fly me to the moon
♪ Let me play among the stars
♫ Let me see what golf is like
♪ Not on Jupiter but Mars (because, as Timmy always says, “the gravity on Jupiter is more than 2.5 times Earth’s but Mars is just 38%”)

The Way You Look Tonight
♪ One hole, when I score awfully low,
♪ When the round is shot,
♪ I will feel a glow just thinking of brew,
♪ And the way brew looks tonight. (they can’t all be gems)

GO SNAPPERS 2026!

Here. We. Go!

[Golf Sheet / Week 1 Thursday, 05-07-2026]<-click

Blade’s Slice:
Here is the Week 1 Sheet in the link above (unless something changes)

The full schedule (so far)… I don’t know the starting holes per week but will update when that info comes my way. the schedule is a round robin for 7 weeks then a position round on week 8. This is repeated with a few tweaks for the next 8 weeks for 16-week schedule.

Snapper Bites:
This is what we have now until I am told otherwise:
2026 League Roster for Majestic:

1. Rick Carlson & Tony Tomaszewski
2. Tim Kachelski & Steve Markunas
3. Dave Wolfenden & Jason Wolfenden
4. Chris Carlson & Cameron Barnett
5. Steve Peltier & Paul Oginski
6. Jerry Carlson & Ed Stotz & Mike Walker
7. Mike Tomaszewski & Rick North
8. Bye

We now have 15 league members ie “SNAPPERS” with 6 two man teams and 1 three man team. Cousin Mike Walker fell and fractured his wrist about 4 weeks ago and while he intends a full recovery and comeback sometime this season, Chris managed to arrange for a friend of his to partner with Jerry. Last season Champs Team CROW/NORTH have left us after a single season. Should any of you have another two man team to join us let me know. Otherwise we will have a weekly BYE rotating and do the blind scorecard draw at the end for points as we have in the past with uneven number of teams.

As always I have contracted with the golf course for a 16 week schedule. I have advised the MAJESTIC that we will start the season on 5/7/2025. Barring cancelation for weather our last week of league golf will be Thursday, August 20, 2026. Should that occur we will likely extend week to week until Labor Day. The Majestic requires full payment on or before week 1 of league. That means I would ask everyone to pay me $592 total (16 weeks x $37) in whatever increments or installments you wish by the 1st week of golf. I will not be collecting in advance anything further or extra for prizes or prize money or a year end scramble meeting with dinner as we have traditionally done. If the consensus is to do that as last year and it can be arranged I will collect from you later.

I will forward full season schedule when prepared at my request by our awesome scrivener/record keeper Jerry DaBlade Carlson. If we have a cancelation for weather the scheduled matches are then considered vacated and we move to the next week with the new matches as scheduled. Any extension of the season by a week or 2 for weather cancelations will have new matches assigned at that time. In other words (or in these exact words) this is who you will play when you play them.

Weekly gambling games will continue. We have the last few years collected $10/team each week at golf for pots with 3 weekly winners. First, greenies or par 3 closest to the pin wins something each week, as does “5 Hole” lowest individual net score on the 5th hole with hole by hole carry over for lowest scores only as tie breakers…and low team net score blind draw skin pot with a week by week carry over as necessary. I suggest mandatory participation including subs as before since payout amounts depends on amount collected.

Finally thank you all for allowing the continuation of the SNAPPERS GOLF LEAGUE, circa 1988. We have survived to thrive. And we welcome 1 new SNAPPER to the league.

Ricky A. Carlson aka “SNAPPER”
810-691-6888

PAY CONVENIENTLY:
VENMO @ Ricky-Carlson-4
Or mail to:
Ricky A. Carlson
Attorney at Law
5955 W. Main St., Ste. 621
Kalamazoo, Michigan 49009

GO SNAPPERS 2026!!!!

[Golf Sheet / FINAL STANDINGS – 9/4 Results]<-click

LINK FIXED (REFRESH)
[SCORES by week 2025 (the good, bad & ugly)]<-click

UPCOMING…
WHAT: [YEAR-END OUTING downloadable pdf]<-click

WHERE: ATLAS VALLEY GOLF CLUB
8313 PERRY RD, GRAND BLANC 48439
WHEN: SUNDAY SEPTEMBER 14, 2025
9:00am (check in); 9:57AM 1ST TEE TIME

IN THIS ISSUE: Results from the final week and a Beer Babe year-in-review. Scramble Teams announced at the end of post.

CONGRATULATIONS TO THIS YEAR’S LEAGUE CHAMPIONS, PAUL CROW & KEITH BROWN!

CUDOS  (FINAL WEEK):

LOW ACTUAL: PAUL CROW  “38”

LOW NET:  STEVE M & CAM  “35”

GREENIES:  STEVE M (no one hit the other green) 

5—HOLE:  STEVE M

TEAM SKIN:  WOLF/JWOLF 2 week carry #10

Blade’s Slice:

The 38^th Snapper Season is in the books, and what a memorable one it was! As noted, this was the first year where no additional funds were collected for prize money, therefore there was no budget for actual prizes. HOWEVER, there is room for VIRTUAL BALLS & PRIZES! Let me know if I missed anything.  ENJOY!!

The Final Majestic Beer Babe of the Week tally as follows: Based on sheer number of wins, we have a tie between Chelsea and Lizzie with 3 wins each. Thanks to all of the ladies and there efforts at keeping us hydrated throughout the year.

• Chelsea 5/8, 6/5, 7/10
• Josie 5/29, 6/19,
• Lizzie 6/5, 7/31, 8/14
• Malyna 6/5, 6/26,
• Sadie 5/15
• Sophia 6/12, 8/14
• Brooke 8/7

It is worth re-playing the completely original song I wrote in one of your sister babe’s honor last year (and not to be confused with any Bob Seger tune). Let it be a MBBOTW anthem!

♫ Off a long and gruesome fairway ♫
♪ Deep in 4-foot straw ♪
♬ You can listen to your partner ♬
♫ Moanin' out his one note song ♫
♪ You can think about the three-putt ♪
♬ On the green you blew the hole before ♬
♫ But your thoughts will soon be wandering ♫
♪ The way they always do ♪
♬ When you're ridin' sixteen over ♬
♫ And there's nothin' much to do ♫
♪ And you don't feel much like golfin' ♪
♬ You just wish the round was through ♬

♫ See here I am ♫
♪ At the beer cart again ♪
♬ There I am ♬
♫ thirst to assuage ♫
♪ Here I go ♪
♬ Ordering a Blue again ♬
♫ There I go ♫
♪ Turn to Paige... ahhh! ♪

AND FINALLY…

The 4-man Scramble teams have been selected based on season average / handicap. All 16 participants were seeded from 1-16 and inserted into pre-draft slots as follows:

TEAM ONE:   1,  8,   9,  16

TEAM TWO:   2,  7,  10,  15

TEAM THREE: 3,  6,  11,  14

TEAM FOUR   4,  5,  12,  13

AND HERE ARE YOUR CURRENT TEAMS (subject to re-draft if there are any cancelations or no-shows. But don’t do that)

TEAM 1 – BRUCE LEACH (3), CHRIS CARLSON (8), MIKE TOMASZEWSKI (8), RICK CARLSON   (15)

TEAM 2 – REY FARAH (5), TIM KACHELSKI (8), PAUL OGINSKY (8), JERRY CARLSON (13)

TEAM 3 – GEORGE OCKERMAN (6), DAVE WOLFENDEN (7), TONY TOMASZEWSKI (9), GLENN SIMMINGTON (11)

TEAM 4 – STEVE PELTIER (7), STEVE MARKUNAS (7), CAMERON BARNETT (9) GRANT STAHLEY (10)

GO SNAPPERS 2025!!!!