WEEK 1 UPDATE: May 6, 2021 By: Snapper (Posted: 5/9)
Low Actual: Keith Cross “38” Low Net: Matt Murany “33” Greenies 1: Steve Markunas Greenies 2: Scott Gregory Team Skin: MURANY/BOYD 5-Hole: Matt Murany AOTD: none
WEEK 1 is in the books…..It was a bit chilly and It was a bit wet but not what the radar had promised so we did it……
Congrats to the following weekly winnas:
GREENIE #1: Steve Markunas #2: Scott Gregory
TEAM SKIN: Matt Murany and Tom Boyd both parred on the par 5 # 7 and both got a ding and none of the other 15 teams matched their net “8”……
5-HOLE: Matt Murany
BIRDIES?: yeah we 3……Keith Cross got one and Kevin Stutsman had 2……
LOW ACTUAL: Keith Cross “38”
LOW NET: Matt Murany “33”
No ASSHOLE OF THE DAY WAS REPORTED….PLEASE DO BETTER NEXT WEEK……DAVE LAWLESS was nominated and got a good natured honorable mention for getting Snapper to invite the entire league in after golf for a round of drinks on him and then not showing……the nomination was made in self defense in anticipation of being called upon to honor the “Round of Drinks” promise….
If you have not yet set up your account and credit card info with the Majestic for food and drink and merchandise and early golf and other purchases why don’t you do so now?????????? Instructions have been emailed to you and the link is on the Majestic Website….
NEW GUYS: GET OVER TO #10 TEE next week…pick up scorecard and weekly sheets there…
IT IS NOW OFFICIALLY GOLF SEASON
THEREFORE IT IS ALSO TIME TO COMMIT TO & RESERVE YOUR SPOT IN THE SNAPPERS NORTH 2021 YEAR-END SEPTEMBER GROUP
DATES: Thursday September 23, 2021 – Sunday, September 26, 2021
ITINERARY: (Link at top of this post)
PRICE: $100 Deposit Due Now FULL PAYMENT: $555 Due deadline: 9/1/21
PAY DEPOSIT VIA VENMO: @Ricky-Carlson-4
PAY DEPOSIT BY CHECK/MAIL:
Ricky A. Carlson, Attorney at Law
5955 W. Main St., Kalamazoo, Mi 49009
I’ll be in Florida for the next 2 weeks, so this website will not get updated until after week 3. Not sure what Snapper has in store for a sheet handout for week 3, but may I suggest you keep week 2’s sheet and recycle for week 3… The handicaps will not change and the schedule is also posted there.
PICTURES REQUEST: All Snappers – take a photo or two during your round and email them to me (with a description if required) at dablade1 @ gmail.com and I will post them to this blog site. For you new guys, this includes any photo submissions and nominations for the Majestic Beer Babe of the Week (see archives). If you feel the service provided by your beer cart gal was above and beyond, force them to pose with you for a photo with the promise that they have been nominated for a Major Award (they know the drill). Hint: They’ll win.
SET UP YOUR POS CREDIT CARD/DEBIT CARD ACCOUNT FOR COURSE PURCHASES & DISCOUNTS NOW PLEASE!!!!
THANK YOU TO THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE PREPAID YOUR DUES……I HAVE THEM ON ACCOUNT AND YOU DO NOT HAVE TO STAND IN LINE WITH EVERYONE ELSE TO PAY ME CASH ON NIGHT #1….NOT THAT I MIND THAT…..YOU ARE TO BE PAID IN FULL THE 1st NIGHT AND I APPRECIATE EVERYONE COMING TO ME RATHER THAN MAKING ME COME TO YOU…..BUT
YOU CAN STILL MAIL ME A CHECK OR BETTER YET SEND ME YOUR MONEY IN A SIMPLE FREE ELECTRONIC FUND TRANSFER YOUR BANK ACCOUNT TO MINE VIA VENMO.
WE HAVE A SUB LIST….FOR EXAMPLE DAVE LAWLESS WHO HAS BEEN IN THIS LEAGUE SINCE THE BEGINNING AND RELUCTANTLY BOWED OUT THIS YEAR AS A REGULAR DUE TO THE DEATH OF HIS FRIEND AND PARTNER OUR OW BELOVED “PIC PIC” WOULD LIKE ME TO INFORM YOU ALL OF 2 THINGS:
1) HE WOULD LOVE TO BE ASKED BY ANY OF YOU TO SUB THROUGHOUT THE YEAR (you can reach him thru me if not directly)….. and
2) HE WILL BE AT LEAGUE ON MAY 6 2021 to golf as an extra/pacer and INTENDS TO PURCHASE THE LEAGUE A ROUND OF DRINKS AT THE END FOR A FAREWELL PIC PIC TOAST…
IF YOU NEED A SUB OF COURSE BRING YOUR OWN BUT BETWEEN JAMIE AND MYSELF WE KNOW HOW TO REACH ALOT OF GUYS WHO HAVE SUBBED OR BEEN LEAGUE MEMBERS IN THE PAST…CALL US….TEXT US…
GO SNAPPERS 2021!!! See yas soon……l.
Remembering Bill ‘Pic Pic’ Cape. (by: Jerry)
I always looked forward to the weeks we were scheduled to play against my long-time buddy, Bill, and his golf partner Dave., for I knew there would be nothing but laughter and fun the entire night. They’ve been known by many monikers – early on as “the MacKenzie Brothers” for their constant banter back and forth reminiscent of the famous “hoser” Great White North Canadian tv brothers from by gone days. They have been called “The Budweiser Twins” due to the full ‘tool box’ of their favorite beverage, and even compared to the Skipper (Dave) and his l’il buddy Gilligan (Bill). I had the pleasure of introducing Bill to the league and playing with him as his golf partner at Tyrone for the first few years in the late 80s and early 90s (until he dumped me for Dave). He loved playing hot into that large netting that protected the parking lot (on #9?) because the ball would drop by the green. The last hole was “the coffee hole”, of which Bill won more than his fair share. The 100-yard fairway putts… “ROUTINE!” the looong ball address waggles, as the cigarette ash dangled precariously over his teed ball (like a Angelo’s fry cook over the burger patty) Every memory I have of my friend Bill brings a smile and I am going to miss him tremendously. I dipped into the AOTD archives and grabbed some of my favorite highlights from over the years. If there was anyone who has embraced the spirit of the AOTD award, it was Bill. Enjoy! – Jerry
Bill Cape feigning nonchalance at having won the 5 hole and apparently enamored with the high stakes skin pot looked scornfully at the handful of dollar bills presented to him and rolled his eyes as if the $26 was not worth his effort
June, 2012 – AND THE WINNER IS… BILL “Pic Pic” Cape for extreme ingratitude. Now understand that as a longtime Snapper, Bill has taken it upon himself to assist the many new guys this year to fully understand the spirit of our league in our loose rules to make the game of golf more enjoyable and less oppressive. So last week, playing against new guys Harrison & Hamon, Bill found himself in a not uncommon circumstance after hitting his 1st shot (according to partner Lawless) into the shit, then (also according to Lawless) hitting at least his 2nd shot and perhaps his 3rd shot into the shit, Bill is now definitely in the shit. Surveying the situation, he realized that there were pickery thingys about him making the “snow angels” option uncomfortable (and having left his pruning shears in the cart too far away to retrieve) Bill decided on a combination of two tricks he uses on occasion First came the old “Stamp down your feet all around the hazard with baby steps” then the “delay your next shot as long as it takes” to get some relief offered from your opponents. This one is usually used on the green when Bill fumbles in his pocket feigning inability to find a coin to mark his ball in his opponents line. FINALLY, after an eternity as Harrison/Hamon feared groups of Snappers would begin stacking at the tee behind them, they announced in unison, “GO AHEAD and move your ball out a little. We are not that serious about scoring”. Bill quickly accepted, picking up his ball and throwing it several feet to safety and snarled back at them: “It took you long enough!” For this exclamation, Pic Pic was voted AOTD.
ASSHOLE OF THE DAY, June 16, 2011: Dishonorable Mentions: Bill Cape, for driving the passenger tires of his golf cart erratically over large landscape rocks which were placed precariously beside the paved cart path near the worker’s booth just outside of the clubhouse prior to the round. When “John” the shuttle driver objected, Bill feigned a back and neck injury, boisterously complaining the fact that there were no warning signs of “ROCKS NEXT TO CART PATH AHEAD”. “Why are there no arrows or reflectors clearly marking this hazard?,” inquired Bill. Darren answered this question with his own, “Don’t the large rocks mark themselves?” To which Bill retorted, “Obviously the safety of the customers are not a top priority,” as he rubbed the back of his neck and dangling the prospects of a class action as bait in a feeble attempt to get Nakes to take the case. “Besides, I was distracted by my partner Dave’s yelling,” to which Jamie responded, “Yeah, he was yelling ‘WATCH OUT FOR THE ROCKS'”. Jamie also made the point that Bill had no business piloting a cart at the clubhouse prior to the boatride to the starting tenth tee. Partner Dave successfully argued that they shouldn’t be expected to walk the 20 feet from the booth the the shuttle pickup in front of the beer boat
ASSHOLE OF THE DAY:, July 23, 2009: Bill Cape for behavior unbecoming of a Snapper. Upon collecting, Paul wanted to show the Snappers his appreciation for their accumulative inability to push the skins pot again by buying a round of drinks. As the waitress went around of table shouts of “Hieneken”, “Sam Adams” and the like were rattled off in rapid order. When she reached Bill Cape he politely waved her off saying, “I’m good”. An awkward silence immediately fell over the table, followed by many emphatic reminders from fellow Snappers that “the best kind of beer is…. FREE BEER!” The only defense offered by “Pic-Pic” was that he was only trying to be polite, which of course was summarily dismissed by the Snappers.
July, 2007 – Honorable Mention to Bill Cape who came to the clubhouse proudly with two count em two what he calls replacement balls for others he unfortunately cannot find. Both of these balls were said by Lawless to have been deep enough in the woods that no one but Bill would venture there, there being no normal reason to do so. But Bill knew that if his ball were to be found it would be found deep and he just canâ€™t afford to not even look hole after hole. This time he comes out from the 20 minute or so search and rescue mission with two, count em two replacements and to make it even better he knows who the previous owners were -one ball having “Shang” embossed in blue sharpie and the other with a preprinted scales of justice and “Carlson Attorney” logo. Rubbing their noses in it, Shang just smiled and shook his head but Snapper appeared incredulous when exclaiming: “Bill, I put that ball there for advertising! you already know I’m a lawyer – I would have paid you $20 to leave it there.” Bill didn’t buy it and proudly posed for a pretentious photo of the pilfered prizes.
june 3, 2004 – Bill received a unanimous vote to win the 2nd AOTD award in 2004. Here are the facts as I know them. Dave asked his partner for the yardage on an approach shot, and Bill answered by stating that Dave had 125 yards to the hole. Dave selected a club based on Bill’s yardage response, and struck it well, flying directly over the flagstick, landing 20-some yards long of the green! “There’s no way I hit my 9-iron 140 yards!,” exclaimed Dave. “Maybe that red thing (brick) means 100 yards after all,” answered Bill. Whether Bill purposely provided his partner with false yardage information, or he really thought that the red bricks were 125-yard markers, we may never know. I think we can all agree that Bill is deserving of the AOTD in either case. We might also suggest that Dave open his eyes on occasion!
Asshole-of-the-Day, September 4, 2004 -Cape paced the green as he pretended to line up his 5-foot putt, but in reality he was in “gimmee putt” (pick-pick) mode. Bill began to use every tried-and-true, battle-tested method he’d employed in the past to successfully secure a “pick-pick.” Bill must have been thinking about the cost effective award, as he skillfully argued, pleaded, then shamelessly begged for permission to pocket this 5-footer. Finally, his finely honed gimmee skills must have tired his opponents, and the pick-pick was granted. The only problem was, Cape’s masterful display was wasted as he realized that he had already maxed the hole out (invoking the “double par + 1” a/k/a: 7/11 rule).
August 7, 2003 – Bill and Dave won the first team asshole-of-the-day award two weeks ago, when they showed up to the golf course wearing nametags. They were scheduled to play Fulgham and Blevins, and Gary had mistakenly called Bill “Dave” and Dave “Bill” a few times during a round earlier in the season (and all involved having been league members continuously for over a decade).
No problem so far. This was actually a considerate gesture, helping out a seasoned member of our league. I mean, you wouldn’t call a boyscout an “asshole” for gently taking an elderly woman’s elbow and slowly helping her cross the street, right? But what if the elderly lady suffered from alzheimer’s and the boyscout left her on an unfamiliar corner (in the country) to see if she could find her way home?
That’s the best analogy I can think of to explain the cold-hearted and callous act of what came next. Sometime during the round, Dave and Bill Surreptitiously switched nametags to confuse and bewilder Gary. Shame!
6/8/00 (week 6) Steve Markunas wins for allowing himself to be duped by the Snapper’s own version of Abbott and Costello, our very own con men, Cape and Lawless. Steve was rightfully feeling pretty good about himself after his round of 39, having broke the notorious “40 barrier”. Bill and Dave feigned disbelief and demanded proof by proposing Steve call out his hole-by-hole score and they would answer with the running total. Steve agreed, and started the process by shouting “four and three”! Bill and Dave responded with a “Seven”. “Five” said Steve. “Thirteen”, exclaimed the boys. Steve continued his hole-by-hole score, unaware that an extra stroke had surreptitiously been added to his total. When Steve proudly reached his score on hole #9 and inevitably the total was “40”, his sails deflated. 40 is still a good score, but not when you are expecting a 39. Would Chuck Yeager have been satisfied had he traveled only 1,115 feet per second? That’s pretty fast, but as every Snapper realizes, the speed of sound is 1,116 feet per second (at sea level and at 59degrees F).
Bill Cape was runner-up when, upon arriving to the course, pulled his vehicle into a parking spot clearly marked by a “Reserved for Golf Professional” sign. Bill’s defense was that he felt the sign was “kind of vague” since it didn’t actually name a particular golf professional. Even his own partner, Dave Lawless, wasn’t buying it when he rhetorically asked “what was your score again tonight Bill?”
Tim Kachelski makes it close for “removing his golf glove to take a piss”. According to Bill Cape, it made the entire group uncomfortable, and Bill was visibly shaken in the clubhouse hours later.
Dave Wolfenden, for denying “pick picks” between his own partner and an opponent, when they had already agreed upon the exchange. (of course it involved Cape, who else?)
August 12, 1999 A.O.T.D. – Bill Cape (2 weeks in a row!) Bill started “fluffing up” what he thought to be his ball (advancing it several yards down field). During this process, there were angry “high pitched” shouts of “THAT’S MY BALL!” from the women’s league that had been waiting patiently behind them until then. Bill checked and sure enough, his “Flying Lady” was a different number.
7/23/98 Week 11 award is a split between Dave Lawless and Bill Cape for their varying accounts of how their cart ended up ramming poor old defenseless Gary Fulgham’s cart (a long time elderly league member). Bill was behind the wheel, but he would have us believe that Dave became impatient with Bill’s safety precautions, resulting in Dave recklessly stepping on the accelerator and causing the crash. Dave’s contention is that HE was concerned for the safety and well being of his partner when he gently engaged the pedal in an attempt to get the cart away from the front of the green and incoming shots. According to Dave, the situation became precarious when Bill became disoriented and viciously turned the wheel into poor old Mr. Fulgham’s cart.
6/8/94 -Dishonorable mention goes to Bill Cape. It was learned after the official AOTD vote that, when questioned why he was marking his ball decidedly closer to the hole, Bill explained that it was common practice to take a flag sticks distance. (this was, of course, the par 3 greenie winner)1993- A.O.T.D. – Bill Cape, for paying $240 (to date) towards the $220 total league dues.
WHAT: Snappers 2020 year-end scramble WHEN: Sunday, September 13 @ 1:30PM start (check in by 1pm) WHERE: DAVISON CC is located at 9512 E Lippincott, Davison, MI 48423. Near M- 15 and I-69..use your GPS!!!!
WEEK 16 UPDATE: August 27th, 2020 By: Snapper (Posted: 9/2)
Low Actual: Mike Romanowski/Tom Harrison “40” Low Net: Tony Tomaszewski “33” Greenies 1: Chris Johns Greenies 2: Steve Peltier Team Skin: Carryover 5-Hole: Ron Harmon
TEAM SKIN: carry over par 4 hole 11 was drawn and cut….this week we will break the pot as usual by drawing new hole(s) as many times as necessary (everybody is in every time except 9th draw when we would tie break as if the 5 hole)
JAMIES SCRATCH SKINS: TOMMY HARRISON I believe as he did have the 1 and only birdie for the night…….
It is final night and of course a position round….The leaders are team Cooper/Harrison…..rumor has it that half of that team will miss the night again on a non covid related reason…..hmmmmm????
Calculations are in and if correct it appears that only 3 teams remaining have a chance to win enough points to be called league champs: Tom Harrison and whoever his substitute is this week… Team Carrier/Ford , their opponents and Team Kachelski/Markunas …..Harrison can lock them out by scoring 14 points and Carrier/Ford can lock them out only by scoring a hefty 17….any split by the top 2 opens the door for TK/Hollywood who have potential spoilers Stutz/Johns…The rest of us????? Cannon Fodder but grudgingly so…..
ENJOY PEOPLE …..
SEE YA ON THE PATIO UPON COMPLETION OR IF NOT THEN 9/13/2020n @ Davison CC for the year end or if not then SNAPPERS NORTH 2020 or if not then next year I hope!!!!
and now the much anticipated conclusion to Jerry and The Rick’s blockbuster coloring book on the history of the Beer Babe – The Final Chapter (or is it the first?)
Prehistoric Beer babes… one with Prehistoric Snapper
WEEK 15 UPDATE: August 20th, 2020 By: DaBlade (Posted: 8/23)
Low Actual: Jamie Leece “35” Low Net: Jamie Leece “31” Greenies 1: Tommy Harrison Greenies 2: Chris Johns Team Skin: Carryover 5-Hole: Johnny Martin AOTD: none
Jamie’s low actual sub-par score of 35 ties low round for the year with Coop, who just so happened to be on his way to beating this before his steely-eyed concentration (and game) suffered from a mood-altering nearby miss drive from behind on the 9th fairway that originated the former’s group. Hmmm.
BIRDIE CLUB: Jamie Leece, Chris Johns 2xs, Steve Markunas, Dave Furey and Steve ‘Shang’ Peltier all added to their birdie totals. Nicely done.
ODDS & ENDS: OK, so the tee times reflected on last week’s sheet was a little more irrelevant than normal, as several Snappers jumped the order with the excuse that they had to drive 2 hours north after the round in order to arrive in time for a golf tournament scheduled to start a mere 48 hours later (or something). The assumption being that the rest of us didn’t have things to do this weekend.
MATHEMATICALLY ELIMINATED: With 2 weeks remaining – with golf on August 27th and then the position round on September 3rd to cap the season – Team Jerry C and Rick B’s dream of hoisting the championship trophy has been postponed for another year, as we are sitting on 149 points. That is, even if every other team were a no-show for the next two weeks and thereby scoring “0”, and consequently Carlson/Bailey scoring 44 points to end at 193 for the year, we would still fall one short. Very sad, as all of you know how much that would mean to us…
Finally, why is our Logo character (above) wearing his facemask?…
WEEK 14 UPDATE: August 13th, 2020 By: Snapper (Posted: 8/18)
NOTE: UPDATED 8/20
Low Actual: Chris Johns “36” Low Net: Chris Johns, Dave Lawless “30” Greenies 1: Chris Johns Greenies 2: The Rick Bailey Team Skin: Johnny Martin/Tony Burton 5-Hole: Kenny Hochstein AOTD: none
5-HOLE: Ken Hochstein (way to go Kenny…we had about 8 or 9 man tie for 2nd we didn’t have to break)
TEAM SKIN: Johnny Martin and Tony Burton…..a 3 weeker worth $150 minus the drinks you bought after thanks!!!!
WAY TO GO GUYS…
AOTD: nope…..thankfully the meeting quorum was long gone (as was I) when it was discovered around 11:30pm on the deck that I forgot the manbag when I left….
JAMIES SCRATCH SKINS: Chris Johns…DJ and Tommy all scored unmatched birdies for cash….
Other Birds: Snapper (welcome to the birdie club with his 1st of the year)….Chris Johns (had 3 birds total)….Wolf….JWolf…Tom Boyd…Dave Lawless..Romo and The Rick……..Wow that’s some birds…..No EAGLES still….
SIDE NOTE: I couldn’t bring myself to give this man AOTD for fear his wife or significant other reads our blog page…but somebody sitting on the deck long after golf enjoying one adult beverage after another (some at the expense of Johnny Martin and Tony Burtons hospitality after winning the big skin….was well appeared to be flirting with an off duty beer babe TARA ….making eye contact in Bill Clinton style….sniffin her hair when she wasn’t looking (Sleepy Joe Biden style) finally got his due….after learning her much younger than he age he asked a few too many times if he Had a chance? Because of her “Daddy Issues” …and wasn’t she giving him some shit….she replied: “Im pretty sure Im the one having to listen to your shit allnight!!! “Or words to that effect….congrats on the slap down Snapper League member we know who you are…
DOUBLE SIDE NOTE AFTER THOUGHT INTENTIONAL OVERSIGHT: Yours truly Snap Daddy has been rightfully accused of failing to mention an accomplishment….On a night when Cooper & DJ & Fuery & Wolf turned in scorecards with sub 40 scores on them then Chris Johns has a card with even par 36 on it…yours truly eyes begin to glass over with dreams of what that shit must feel like…& there on the very same scorecard was an enigmatic truly worthy of mention “38” posted by Dave Lawless completely overlooked..(5 beautiful pars & a bird)…by me that is…and my normally above average proofreader…not by his partner Bill Cape who when reached for unsolicited comment said: “Yea I got a comment…this is total BS…all them other guys shooting 30 something are good golfers and Chris Johns…Hell everybody knows how good he is…but not to mention Lawless?.. BS I say again…he shot 38 and everybody knows he sucks…you shoulda wrote him up the 1st time!”….THANKS BILL…got it… (smaller font size used for emphasis on purpose as another slight)
Congratulationsto Ryleigh, The Majestic Beer Babe of the Week. She proudly proclaimed this was her second win of the year.
Last week was not the fastest round every played in league history. Can you answer the question above? (correct guesses or funny wrong answers both accepted)
After posting the epilogue of my new book, History of the Beer Babes last week, the pre-orders have been piling in. So, as promised, here is an additional sneak peek…
WEEK 13 UPDATE: August 6th, 2020 By: Snapper (Posted: August 12)
Low Actual: Scott Ford “37” Low Net: Tom Boyd “34” Greenies 1: Larry Cooper Greenies 2: Tom Boyd Team Skin: Carry over 5-Hole: Herb Green AOTD: Kevin Stutzman
LOW ACTUAL: Scott Ford “37” WTF? On the back? YOU DA MAN!!!!!
LOW NET: Tom Boyd “34”
5-HOLE: Herb Green (God Bless you Herbie…nice to see)
TEAM SKIN: carry over….hole 17 drawn and cut twice
WAY TO GO GUYS…
AOTD????: KEVIN STUTZMAN was our winner this week after his playing partner sub Bruce Leach stormed off the course with his bag over his shoulder before the round was completed taking a max out 11 on the par 5 finishing hole…..When asked what he did to make his normally mild mannered (extremely high and intoxicated) partner so angry as to refuse to remain in the cart with him for 9 holes, Kevin only shrugged………OK no defense ? no mercy….ASSHOLE! (however note Kevin was heard to exclaim with a smile after the vote: “Now all I need is an Eagle to complete the Suduko Quest sheet challenge……and so it shall be…
JAMIES SCRATCH SKINS: COOP….Scott Ford…..Herb and Tony Burton all scored unmatched birdies for cash….
Other Birds: OGI (welcome to the birdie club with his 1st of the year)…..Shang (again….why don’t you ever get in the game and skin these f ers?????…and Tom Boyd
Also this week: To most everyone’s surprise “Sleepy Joe” Biden selected a black woman as his running mate (unless of course she too votes for Trump and then “She aint Black!!)
WHAT IS BETTER AS A PAIR? (Besides Labatts Blue!! A pair of hockey beers!!)
SAY IT WHEN YOU SEE IT!
..and lastly, a picturesque shot of the “Heart Hole”.
Legend has it that the brick chimney with the heart stone at the top and rising from the ruins was once the early homestead of the very first beer babes who located to Lake Walden in the early 1800s. They originated from somewhere in the east and were followed by many thirsty cowboys as they traveled by stagecoach chock full of beer. (to be continued…)
WEEK 12 UPDATE: July 31, 2020 By: Snapper (Posted: August 1)
Low Actual: Bruce Leach “36” Low Net: Paul O, Tom H, Jake F, Kevin S “33” Greenies 1: JasonCarrier Greenies 2: Larry Cooper Team Skin: $Carry over 5-Hole: DJ Hochstein AOTD: Nope
WAY TO GO GUYS…
AOTD: Unknown (probably several worthy candidates, but with Snapper off and me ghosting – the tales to go untold). Tony T bore the weight of the manbag and fulfilled his assigned duties admirably. However, 10 minutes before league tee time, several folks became panicked at the prospects of having to do math when it was made clear that there were no official league cards already filled in and complete with hole-by-hole handicaps. “Where do our league dues go?”,
was a popular refrain. According to Tony, Ricky had assigned Jamie the responsibility for bringing the completed cards – having taken a set of blanks home the week before for this very thing – but then didn’t bother to show. (Asshole?). But then with just mere seconds to spare, Wolfy rushed to the beer deck to secure an additional set of blank cards from the manbag and sped to the first tee to pass them out to the line of waiting Snappers. Nice save, Dave!
BIRDIE-FEST: Twelve birdies in all… Wow! – Congratulations to Jason Carrier, Jake Ford (2xs!), Dave Wolfenden, DJ Hochstein, Herb Green, Tim Kachelski, Dave Fury, Johhny ‘Golf’ Martin, Matt Murany, Tom Harrison and Kevin Stutzman. And then there was Rick Bailey’s “Birdie 4” on the par three 8th, when his drive hit a goose. The bird was no worse for wear, and honked his displeasure at us as we approached the green, along with the other (hundreds?) in the goose herd.
WORTHY OF NOTE: The league average for this week was a record low of 44.14, with 8, count ‘em, 8! sub-40 scores (5 league members and 3 ringer subs). Nice!
JAMIES SCRATCH SKINS: Bruce, Lenny and DJ split $31 ea.
DID YOU KNOW?: Flock of geese – The collective noun for a group of geese on the ground is a gaggle; when in flight, they are called a skein, a team, or a wedge; when flying close together, they are called a plump. When sitting and shitting next to a golf course green, they are called [expletive deleted].
WEEK 11 UPDATE: July 23, 2020 By: Snapper (Posted: July 25)
Low Actual: Larry Cooper “35” Low Net: Tony Burton “29” Greenies 1: Larry Cooper Greenies 2: Tony Burton Team Skin: Snapper/Tony T ($200 pot) 5-Hole: Matt Murany AOTD: Steve Markunas
AOTD????: Honorable Mention to 1st runner up Johnny Martin for ill-advised abuse of US currency…to pay off a bet with Wolf he crumpled a $20 bill into a small ball and threw it at him… missed… and lost it in the bushes… 2nd runner up Rick Carlson for looking right at Jake Ford and offering him greenie money when being told Tony Burton won… yes, both newbies but I know which is which… but did I??? and winna is: Steve Markunas for taking the greenie stakes from me early saying its position round and I’m going 1st – I got em…. then waiting for Timmy in the parking lot while 3 teams went off ahead of him without the stakes…
JAMIES SCRATCH SKINS: COOP….STUTZ and ROMO all won $25
WORTHY OF NOTE: Team Skins Winners bought the league a round upon winning the team skin…. Nice ? Sure….Impressive? not really, since multiple BEER BABES bought the league Fireball Shots …Not Once, But Twice!!!!
“WHO HAS IT BETTER THAN US??!!!”
“WHO HAS BETTER BEER BABES THAN US?!”
Answer To Both: NOBODY!!!!!!!
THANK YOU LADIES!
(DaBlade’s UPDATE) SCARY MOMENT at the last hole gallery, when I witnessed what appeared to be Majestic Beer Babe, Molly, on the receiving end of some abdominal thrusts (otherwise known as the Heimlich maneuver – a first aid procedure used to treat upper airway obstructions by foreign objects).
The concerned looks on the faces on nearby Snappers – while hard to look at – tell the story better than words.
I didn’t see what caused Molly to choke, but thanks to a quick thinking Timmy ‘Doctor K’ Kachelski, she will continue to sling beer & accoutrements to thirsty Snappers for many years!
Unwinding on the beer deck…
History of the Majestic Beer Babes of the Week
The Snapper League has been awarding the MBBOTW award to lucky beer babes since July 9, 2007, when Lori Lynn was first inducted with the now famous “ponytail and thigh” shot. Since then, many have been honored with this prestigious award. Sadly, we have yet to get that elusive shot of the MBB in her “natural habitat”, but sit back and enjoy them captured in captivity supplying their precious cargo of golden nectar to thirsty Snappers. God bless America. And God bless our MBBs!
MBB Natural Habitat: At the end of the day towards dusk, the beer babes gather down at the dock on Lake Walden, playfully wading and splashing each other to cool off, their soaked and clinging attire dripping in slow motion…